So, it’s two in the morning and there you are sitting on the sofa. In the dark. Alone and with nothing to do. You don’t want to watch T.V because all that’s on are boring infomercials and you already have the entire Sham-Wow sales pitch memorized. Plus, you still have SOME dignity. Listening to music is out of the question since you smashed your MP3 player into pieces after hearing the new Justin Bieber song for the one millionth time. You sigh to yourself, get up and plop your butt in front of your trusty computer, your only true friend. What can you do that doesn’t involve porn or work? How about playing some useless games.
Below are five websites which have no real purpose but can be entertaining and addicting as hell. I only put five here because if I wrote about every single one, my great-great grandchildren will be the ones finishing this article. Again, links are provided. So away we go.
#1 Virtual Bubblewrap
Who doesn’t remember the joy of opening a package with a fragile knick-knack inside and finding that it was wrapped in a clear sheet of plastic with little round nubs full of air? To us, as kids, bubble wrap was more fun than that expensive toy you begged your parents to buy for your birthday, then promptly tossed it in the back of your closet after two days.
It was so oddly satisfying to press each bubble and hear that small “pop”. Obviously, you can’t drag an entire roll of bubble wrap to your job, unless you work at a post office but you can still get your “pop on”.
Cleverly name Virtual Bubblewrap, evidently because being creative gave the game maker a migraine, is pretty self explanatory. The objective? Pop the bubbles using your mouse.
There is a timer underneath to see how long it takes you to do the entire sheet. It’s also very convenient to see how much of your life you’ll never get back.
For those lazy kids who would simply twist the sheet to pop the bubbles faster, there is an option called “manic mode”, where each click will pop more than one bubble at a time.
There is also an Android app for when you’re on a crowded bus and want to find out how long other people will tolerate the popping sound before punching you in the face and throwing you out the back window.
#2 Adam’s Guitar
Adam’s Guitar is well, a guitar (duh). First things first, you choose one of three guitars. After you pick your new gee-tar, you move on to the next screen.
What’s cool about this game is that you can change the cords and have the option of either strumming the guitar with your mouse or use your keyboard. You can also record and play back the song you made so you have tangible proof that you suck at playing a guitar. You know, the one that sounds like Lenny Kravitz to you, but to your friends and family it sounds like a teenager in a bad garage band who’s having a seizure. It’s also very loud, so if your kid finds it and likes it, your house will sound like a banshee convention. It will be the bane of your life and you have me to thank.
#3 Switch Zoo
If your favorite channel is Animal Planet and “The Island of Dr. Moreau” was not just a movie but your dream utopia, then here is your new favorite game.
Switch Zoo is actually an educational game designed to teach kids about different types of animals and their habitats which they can build. It’s a great idea and now I have a new game my kids will no doubt fight over.
There’s different games to play but the most entertaining one involves using different animal parts to create a whole new breed of…….man, bear, pig or something.
Gublerland is the brain child of Matthew Gray Gubler who stars on the show Criminal Minds. His character is very straight forward, very shy and not insane. MGG, however, is WAAAAAY on the other side of that spectrum but you can’t help but love the little wierdo. Go to his website and you will find that normal is apparently for losers and insanity reigns supreme.. Oh, he is also the guy who drew all those pictures on the site. I’m not sure whether to be really impressed or concerned for his mental health. Screw it, I’m impressed.
This is the main screen.
What makes this site so addicting is that every single drawing is clickable and you will find yourself clicking on every single one to be routed to other pages or seeing some drawings come to life. If you click on the teepee shaped “Immigration Office”, you go to a page where you can print and fill out an immigration certificate and take the official oath so you can become a citizen and live among all the other LSD takers who call this place home. It’s actually way easier to become a citizen here than going through the American government.
Also, check out the videos on the site because thy’re HILARIOUS!
Do you have no friends? Is the term “forever alone” your life motto? Would it be great if you had someone to talk to? If so, let me introduce you to:
Their names are Evie (the girl) and Boibot. Using either your keyboard or a microphone, you can talk them and they’ll answer back. Granted, alot of the responses are, let’s say, “interesting”, but it makes for some crazy conversations. Besides, you have no friends so now is not the time to be picky about who you talk to.
Evie was the first bot on the Existor website, but recently, she’s been joined by a male bot and I must warn you that they can be pretty mean.
It’s fun because you can be really creative and ask them the most outlandish questions then sit back and watch their reactions. Be prepared to get burned from them too.